| | shOrt jOkes |  |
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+4hala abdennacer loukah hAsnAe chennOufmed 8 participants |
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
 |  Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes  Sam 25 Oct - 10:31 | |
| Two Guys in a Bar
Two guys walk into a bar and sit down to eat their lunches. Then the bartender says, ”Sorry, but you can’t eat your own food in here.”
So the two guys look at each other and swap lunches.
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to swap : to exchange | |
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Mar 11 Nov - 17:08 | |
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Hand In Marriage
A man patted his daughter's hand fondly, and told her, "Your young man told me today he wanted you as a bride, and I gave my consent."
"Oh, Daddy," gushed the daughter, "it's going to be so hard leaving Mummy."
"I understand perfectly, my dear," beamed the man. "You can take her with you!" |
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Driss Boudhan
Admin
Nombre de messages : 13504
Date d'inscription : 02/02/2008
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Driss Boudhan
Admin
Nombre de messages : 13504
Date d'inscription : 02/02/2008
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Mar 11 Nov - 17:31 | |
| I took a philosophy test that asked us to explain Nothingness.
I left it blank. | |
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Mar 25 Nov - 17:09 | |
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*What's a waste of energy?
*Telling a hair-raising story to a bald man!
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Sam 6 Déc - 18:04 | |
| Q. What's a man's idea of helping with the housework?
A. Lifting his legs so you can vacuum. | |
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saidani miloudi
poète
Nombre de messages : 975
Date d'inscription : 12/10/2008
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Dim 7 Déc - 6:32 | |
| On the occasion of Aid Al Adha a fellah bought a dress to his wife. W. : I don't like a dress that fastens before! (behind). H. : But you have never had a dress that fastens before before,haven't you? tASTE THIS STICK then ! and he beat her like a snake !!! saidani miloudi  | |
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saidani miloudi
poète
Nombre de messages : 975
Date d'inscription : 12/10/2008
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Dim 7 Déc - 7:02 | |
| شو وجه الشبه بين الجزر والبنطلون الضيق؟
الاثنين بقووووا النظر ! | |
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saidani miloudi
poète
Nombre de messages : 975
Date d'inscription : 12/10/2008
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Dim 7 Déc - 7:03 | |
| محشش عم يسأل رفيقه : تخيل تقوم الصبح تلاقى حالك ميت!
قال : والله بنتحر | |
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saidani miloudi
poète
Nombre de messages : 975
Localisation : maroc
Emploi : Enseignant
Loisirs : reading,poetry writing,internet surfing
Date d'inscription : 12/10/2008
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Dim 7 Déc - 12:12 | |
| أب يقول لإبنه: ياولدي أنا نويت أخطبلك
رد عليه الولد: لاوالله يا يبه شكراً أنا من شفت ذوقك في أمي وانا غاسل يدي.!!
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Localisation : Meknes/MOrOccO
Emploi : PrOf
Loisirs : reading...
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Mar 23 Déc - 13:34 | |
| A police recruit was asked during the exam, "What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?"
He said, "Call for backup." | |
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Localisation : Meknes/MOrOccO
Emploi : PrOf
Loisirs : reading...
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Ven 23 Jan - 18:53 | |
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Recognition
The defendant stood up in the dock and said to the judge, "I dont recognize this court!"
"Why?" asked the Judge.
"Because you've had it decorated since the last time I was here." |
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Localisation : Meknes/MOrOccO
Emploi : PrOf
Loisirs : reading...
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Mer 18 Fév - 16:29 | |
| Responsible
Employer to applicant: "In this job we need someone who is responsible."
Applicant: "I'm the one you want. On my last job, every time anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Localisation : Meknes/MOrOccO
Emploi : PrOf
Loisirs : reading...
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Mer 18 Fév - 16:37 | |
| -What did you learn in school today?
-Not enough, I have to go back tomorrow! | |
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Localisation : Meknes/MOrOccO
Emploi : PrOf
Loisirs : reading...
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Mer 25 Fév - 18:01 | |
| "Have you written this poem by yourself?"
"Of course," said the young poet, "Every word of it."
"Well, I am very glad to meet you, Mr. Edgar Allan Poe, I was afraid you are dead for long time." | |
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Localisation : Meknes/MOrOccO
Emploi : PrOf
Loisirs : reading...
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Lun 2 Mar - 16:31 | |
| Fishing
Billy and Willy were at Sunday school studying about Noah's ark. On the way home, Willy asked, "Do you think Noah did much fishing?"
"How could he?" said Billy. "He only had two worms".
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saidani miloudi
poète
Nombre de messages : 975
Localisation : maroc
Emploi : Enseignant
Loisirs : reading,poetry writing,internet surfing
Date d'inscription : 12/10/2008
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Lun 2 Mar - 17:02 | |
| Patient : " Doctor , doctor ! I see two of myself "
Doctor : " Just one by one please "
saidani miloudi | |
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Localisation : Meknes/MOrOccO
Emploi : PrOf
Loisirs : reading...
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Lun 2 Mar - 17:15 | |
| - saidani miloudi a écrit:
- Patient : " Doctor , doctor ! I see two of myself "
Doctor : " Just one by one please "
saidani miloudi great one really! thx milOudy | |
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Localisation : Meknes/MOrOccO
Emploi : PrOf
Loisirs : reading...
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
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saidani miloudi
poète
Nombre de messages : 975
Localisation : maroc
Emploi : Enseignant
Loisirs : reading,poetry writing,internet surfing
Date d'inscription : 12/10/2008
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Mer 11 Mar - 14:09 | |
| Ticklish : adj.easily made laugh.
Laugh then for the definition you brutish,British!
SM | |
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Localisation : Meknes/MOrOccO
Emploi : PrOf
Loisirs : reading...
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Jeu 19 Mar - 19:49 | |
| free of charge
The boss came early in the morning one day and found an employee kissing his secretary. He shouted at him, "Is this what I pay you for?"
The employee replied: "No, sir, this I do free of charge."
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Driss Boudhan
Admin
Nombre de messages : 13504
Localisation : Nador
Emploi : Professeur
Loisirs : Musique,lecture,poésie,photo....
Date d'inscription : 02/02/2008
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Sam 21 Mar - 4:58 | |
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saidani miloudi
poète
Nombre de messages : 975
Localisation : maroc
Emploi : Enseignant
Loisirs : reading,poetry writing,internet surfing
Date d'inscription : 12/10/2008
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Sam 21 Mar - 12:18 | |
| واحد اتصل بمراته من الشغل و قلها: انا جاي عالبيت سخنيلي الميه بسرعه.
و قفل التلفون.. سمعو صاحبه..و قاله: هيه دي الرجال ولا بلاش, شكلك فارد شخصيتك تمام بالبيت
رد عليه : يعني عايزني أغسل المواعين بميا بارده؟؟ | |
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Driss Boudhan
Admin
Nombre de messages : 13504
Localisation : Nador
Emploi : Professeur
Loisirs : Musique,lecture,poésie,photo....
Date d'inscription : 02/02/2008
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Sam 21 Mar - 17:26 | |
| How do you make a blonde laugh on a Saturday?
Tell her a joke on a Wednesday.
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Localisation : Meknes/MOrOccO
Emploi : PrOf
Loisirs : reading...
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Jeu 2 Avr - 19:36 | |
| A: Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?
B: Yes I am, I married the wrong woman. | |
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Localisation : Meknes/MOrOccO
Emploi : PrOf
Loisirs : reading...
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Mar 7 Avr - 18:53 | |
| Contacts
A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license. He says :
"Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses."
The woman answered "Well, I have contacts."
The policeman replied "I don't care who you know! You're getting a ticket!"
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Localisation : Meknes/MOrOccO
Emploi : PrOf
Loisirs : reading...
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Lun 20 Avr - 20:05 | |
| Direct Line
A drunken man gets on the bus late one night, staggers up the aisle, and sits next to an elderly woman.
She looks the man up and down and says,
"I've got news for you - You're going straight to hell!"
The man jumps up out of his seat and shouts,
"Good heavens, I'm on the wrong bus!"
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Localisation : Meknes/MOrOccO
Emploi : PrOf
Loisirs : reading...
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Jeu 14 Mai - 18:00 | |
| Diagnosis
A patient complained to his doctor, "I've been to three other doctors and none of them agreed with your diagnosis."
The doctor calmly replied, "Just wait until the autopsy, then they'll see that I was right." | |
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Driss Boudhan
Admin
Nombre de messages : 13504
Localisation : Nador
Emploi : Professeur
Loisirs : Musique,lecture,poésie,photo....
Date d'inscription : 02/02/2008
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Jeu 14 Mai - 18:16 | |
| Son: Dad, what is an idiot?
Dad: An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange and long way that another person who is listening to him can't understand him.
Do you understand me?
Son: No. | |
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Driss Boudhan
Admin
Nombre de messages : 13504
Localisation : Nador
Emploi : Professeur
Loisirs : Musique,lecture,poésie,photo....
Date d'inscription : 02/02/2008
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Jeu 14 Mai - 18:18 | |
| A: Hey, man! Please call me a taxi.
B: Yes, sir. You are a taxi. | |
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Localisation : Meknes/MOrOccO
Emploi : PrOf
Loisirs : reading...
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Lun 29 Juin - 19:34 | |
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Just Like Dad
The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother and said, "I've found a man just like father!"
Her mother replied, "So what do you want from me, sympathy?"
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Localisation : Meknes/MOrOccO
Emploi : PrOf
Loisirs : reading...
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Ven 7 Aoû - 18:58 | |
| Good and Bad News
The doctor took Dan into the room and said, "Dan, I have some good news and some bad news."
Dan said, "Give me the good news."
"They're going to name a disease after you." | |
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chennOufmed
Admin
Nombre de messages : 6208
Localisation : Meknes/MOrOccO
Emploi : PrOf
Loisirs : reading...
Date d'inscription : 08/01/2007
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Dim 23 Aoû - 11:21 | |
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Self Defense
During a practical exercise at a military police base, the instructor was giving the class instruction in unarmed self-defense.
After he presented a number of different situations in which they might find themselves, he asked a student, "What steps would you take if someone were coming at you with a large, sharp knife?"
The student replied, "BIG ones."
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saidani miloudi
poète
Nombre de messages : 975
Localisation : maroc
Emploi : Enseignant
Loisirs : reading,poetry writing,internet surfing
Date d'inscription : 12/10/2008
| | Sujet: Re: shOrt jOkes Dim 23 Aoû - 17:43 | |
| short jokes for class group work activities.
Thanks Chennoufmed.
s.milou | |
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